The club is a relaxed fun place to be, friendly and very welcoming of newcomers. Nobody will pounce on you and do terrible things (unless you ask them nicely!). If it is your first club outing, the unfamiliarity of the situation will soon wear off and you will rapidly feel at ease. Do talk to people (unless they are in the middle of a scene - see 6 below). Relax, introduce yourself and get to know people. The club is not a free-for-all where anyone plays with anyone else - scenes are carefully negotiated and the best way of allowing that to happen is to chat to people and get to know them. Alcohol is served at the club - however be cautious not to overdo it as no one will want to play with anyone who is not fully in control of themselves.
2. Strict Dress Code.
The club has dress code requirements and (R.O.A.R) Right Of Admission is Reserved, this is for several reasons. Refusing admission to people in "street clothes" discourages casually curious gawpers. It helps build atmosphere so that even if you don't wish to actively play, you are still contributing to the ambience. It also means that only people who are prepared to make a certain minimum effort are going to be there. Generally this means that anything rubber, leather or PVC is acceptable, as is provocative, erotic and unusual clothing in more common fabrics. In general it is often easier to define what is not acceptable. i.e. cotton "T" shirt (even black), jeans (even black) are never acceptable. Generally if you would feel comfortable walking down the street in it - then it is not likely to be suitable for the club. The cardinal sin is to not make an effort - anyone who makes no effort to be appropriately dressed will be turned away! Often dress code is seen as a problem by the first time club-goer, however it can become part of the ritual and the act of showering and dressing in something special becomes the first part of the club experience and can set the mood for the evening ahead.
3. Players Have Right Of Way.
Stay out of the way of a scene - if you get hit by the back stroke of a whip etc, it is your fault! You shouldn't have been so close or you should have been looking where you were going. If you are sitting on dungeon equipment chatting and someone wants to use it to play on - move, and move with a good grace. The equipment is there for beating arses - not resting arses.
4. You Can Ask Anyone Anything... If They Say No - Then Don't Ask Again!>
The club is a very open environment and nobody will take offence at a polite question - regardless of what is being asked. However, if you are asking someone to play and they decline - accept the answer with equally good grace and do not ask again. Pestering someone will only put their backs up and in some cases may result in you being asked to leave the club.
5. Don't Touch People Or Toys Without Permission.
In the club you will encounter people in various states of dress, undress and provocative dress. This is not an invitation to touch them in any way other than you would do so in any other social setting (i.e. a pub). Touching people without permission will get you physically ejected from the venue. Do not join in scenes, even if they look like free-for-alls. A scene that might look to you, like lots of people joining in is likely to either be prearranged between the dominant and other players, or that the dominant is subtly signalling audience members that they wish to be involved. Only join in if you are clearly and unambiguously invited to do so, and a glance in your direction does not constitute an invitation. Do not touch people's toys, whips, floggers, etc., that are lying around without finding the owner and asking. Even if someone lets you hold a flogger, it is also courteous to ask again before swinging it through the air at an imaginary target or your forearm.
6. Don't Crowd A Scene, Interrupt A Scene Or Talk To The Players.
If you want to watch a scene, generally that is fine - people wouldn't be playing in a club if they were totally averse to people seeing them play. However - and this is a very important point - They are not playing for your entertainment, so treat their scene with respect. Do not crowd them, do not stand and "gawp", do not make "helpful" suggestions to the dominant and don't make audible comments to other onlookers. A scene is an intimate interaction between the participants, you shouldn't interrupt this any more than you would any other intimate moment between people. If you are asked to move back by one of the participants - do so immediately, without argument or question and with a good grace. The Keyword is 'respect' - watch by all means, from a respectful distance. If you enjoyed the scene then no one is going to be offended by a respectful compliment after the scene is completely over (and the players have had time to come 'down').
7. Single Males.
This is a social event as much as anything, and is usually best enjoyed by couples or mixed social groups. Large groups of single males are discouraged and may fail to gain entry should our door hostess feel uncertain of their intentions.
8. Don't Wank.
Need we say more...? (BEFORE YOU EJECT YOU WILL BE EJECTED FROM THE CLUB!!!)
9. No Cameras. (inc. image capturing mobile phones)
Many people at clubs have perfectly good reasons for not wanting their photographs taken in that environment. Even if your intention is to photograph only yourself or your friends - it is all too easy for others to be inadvertently included in the background of photos, consequently cameras are banned from the club. The only exceptions are invited photographers with "photo passes" who we have selected beforehand. Unauthorised cameras will be confiscated and film/digital media destroyed.
10. Do Enjoy. (Part 2)
At the end of the day all the 'rules' just come down to common courtesy (and a little common sense). It is just a case of applying it in an unfamiliar setting, you should behave with exactly the same courtesy as you would in any other environment. The club is great fun, and full of wonderful people - relax and enjoy it!
Queries regarding any of the above, may be emailed to: firstname.lastname@example.org
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